walking slow = a punch in the head

It’s 9:50 a.m. on Brigham Young University campus and I have a class to get to. Fast.
Lucky for me, I get stuck behind a wall of lazy walkers and I’m still a brisk 10-minute walk away. Like a boxer, I bob and weave.
I attempt to get through the mob of couples that seem to find it appropriate to snuggle while walking. No dice. It seems that I will have to resort to the quick step, complete with lots of elbows.
Success! The dirty looks that are shot at my back hardly break my stride.
It’s now 9:55 a.m. and as I pull up by backpack strings and set my iPod to a catchy beat, I rush to class hoping that I can find a good seat.
No seats to be seen.
My life spirals into what seems like a Shakespearean tragedy. I’m forced to sit on the floor, in the back and with my glasses no where to be found. My carpet-sharing friends smell funny, like feet. Woe is me.
Look at where those slow pokes got me: the dirtied floor with the smelly kids and poor board viewing opportunities.
To all of those who find the need to take a nice leisurely stroll during the mass chaos between classes – stop it. If your body is ailed with arthritis or your shoes are 3 times too big, then please – by all means. Walk as slow as you need.
But until then, obey traffic laws and get up to speed with oncoming traffic before you merge.