walking slow = a punch in the head

It’s 9:50 a.m. on Brigham Young University campus and I have a class to get to. Fast.
Lucky for me, I get stuck behind a wall of lazy walkers and I’m still a brisk 10-minute walk away. Like a boxer, I bob and weave.
I attempt to get through the mob of couples that seem to find it appropriate to snuggle while walking. No dice. It seems that I will have to resort to the quick step, complete with lots of elbows.
Success! The dirty looks that are shot at my back hardly break my stride.
It’s now 9:55 a.m. and as I pull up by backpack strings and set my iPod to a catchy beat, I rush to class hoping that I can find a good seat.
No seats to be seen.
My life spirals into what seems like a Shakespearean tragedy. I’m forced to sit on the floor, in the back and with my glasses no where to be found. My carpet-sharing friends smell funny, like feet. Woe is me.
Look at where those slow pokes got me: the dirtied floor with the smelly kids and poor board viewing opportunities.
To all of those who find the need to take a nice leisurely stroll during the mass chaos between classes – stop it. If your body is ailed with arthritis or your shoes are 3 times too big, then please – by all means. Walk as slow as you need.
But until then, obey traffic laws and get up to speed with oncoming traffic before you merge.


Stephen said...

Lots of love.

natalie. said...

this was for a class. back off.